Grendel

OK, so my first official blog is a digression from business. I have made the mistake of naming the groundhog who lives under our barn. In other words, he has become a “pet,” although I am not going to feed him (famous last words). I have decided to call him Grendel, after the monster from Beowulf. This is because he is huge. My other choice was Godzilla, but he isn’t that big (yet).

Grendel is about two feet long, not including his tail. He is at least 25 pounds, and that (so the Georgia Game Service tells me) is because he is fat and happy in his nice accomodations under the barn that keeps predators out and Grendel in. Grendel is so big that my three dogs just think of him as one of the guys. He likes to sit on the white bench by the barn and sun himself on his back. He also likes to play peek-a-boo in the tall grass with the cows next door. I watch him for about an hour every evening — and every evening he gets a few feet closer to our tomato garden. I am sure that Grendel will succumb to temptation and enter the garden once the tomatoes are ripe.

And that will seal his fate. At the moment, I am quite happy to have him play in the yard every evening. Once he eats the tomatoes, he will have to be dealt with. I think I will rent a humane trap, but I am sure he is wily enough to elude it for a while. My neighbors keep telling me to poke the screen out of the window, aim my shotgun at him, clap my hands to get him to stand up, and then blow him away. But like I said, since he is my pet, I definitely will NOT be doing that. I have toyed with the idea of building a huge cage for him, but I am sure he will prefer relocating to a local forest area — if he can’t stay under the barn.

Time to watch Grendel’s evening show. More soon.

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